"Pigs is Pigs"

Vitagraph Famous Authors' Series by Ellis Parker Butler

You Have Seen Pigs, but Never Such Pigs as These. Two of Them Become Eight Hundred Pigs so Rapidly, They Set Bunny Daffy and Almost Ruin the Express Business.

Director – George D. Baker
Author -- Ellis Parker Butler

CAST

Flannery, an Express Agent.................... JOHN BUNNY
Mr. Morehouse .......................... ETIENNE GIRARDOT
Clerk in Complaint Dept............. COURTLAND VAN DEUSEN
Head of Claims Dept......................... WILLIAM SHEA
Mr. Morgan, Head of Tariff Dept.......... ALBERT ROCCARDI
President of Company...................... ANDERS RANDOLF
Prof. Gordon ............................. GEORGE STEVENS

After a strenuous argument with Flannery, the local Express Agent, Mr. Morehouse refuses to pay the 30c charges on each of two guinea pigs shipped him, claiming they are pets and subject to the 25c rate. Flannery replies, "Pigs is pigs and I'm blame sure them animals is pigs, not pets, and the rule says, '30c each.'" Mr. Morehouse writes many times to the Express Company, claiming guinea pigs are not common pigs, and each time is referred to a different department. Flannery receives a note from the Tariff Department inquiring as to condition of consignment, to which he replies, "There are eight now! All good eaters. Paid out two dollars for cabbage so far." The matter finally reaches the President, who writes a friend, a Zoological Professor. Unfortunately that gentleman is in South Africa, causing a delay of many months, during which time the pigs increase to 160. At last word is received from the learned man proving that guinea pigs are not common pigs. Flannery is then ordered to collect 25c each for two guinea pigs and deliver the entire lot to consignee. There are now 800 and Flannery is horrified to find Morehouse has moved to parts unknown. He is about to give up in despair when the company orders him to forward the entire collection to the Main Office, to be disposed of as unclaimed property, in accordance with the general rule.